Thinking before speaking; now there’s a concept. Those closest to me might suggest that as I age, my filter is growing increasingly defective. You know the filter of which I speak… (That pesky sieve that is supposed to keep the reactive and inflammatory thoughts I am thinking from slipping haphazardly out of my sometimes less than diplomatic lips…)
There is a reason we are instructed to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Typically I’m aware I’ve crossed that tricky acceptability line as soon as my ears (with no small measure of alarm) take note of what my mouth has just done. But even if I were completely and blissfully unaware of my lapse, the look on my daughter’s face quickly alerts me. Her scathing glance causes an immediate and cringing recall of whatever rabble-rousing comment I should not have said. She is perceptive, inclusive, and infinitely sensitive to others. And these wonderful traits make her wince with displeasure when she hears her mother sounding like an abrasive gong. She reminded me gently this weekend as she described a moment I could have been more sympathetic. And she was right.
So in the interest of sounding like the kind and compassionate person I hope to be, I’m working diligently on the slow to speak thing. It isn’t easy. Especially when people around me are acting like idiots... Okay, let’s try that again. “When people around me are making questionable choices, drawing attention to their misguided actions and involving their poor unfortunate offspring in the process.” (Hmmmmm….I’m not sure this is sounding any better…) Like I said, I’m WORKING on it. Not saying I’m there yet…
Dicey topics are the most difficult. But as the media begins buzzing about caucuses and campaigns, one area in which I am hoping to make great strides is my increasing propensity to avoid the arena of politics. I am trying my hardest to stay away from this subject, yet a bubbling frustration has been left simmering and I have an overwhelming desire to vent. Since it's my blog, I'm going for it. I believe political views are a very personal thing. So I’m teaching myself to just bite my tongue and walk away from this type of conversation when it starts. (There are days my tongue hurts from all that biting...) Some of my friends and family disagree with this whole "walking away" philosophy. They want to talk about it, hash it out and try to make me change my mind. "Socratic Method", "growth by challenge", or some other such drivel… Whatever they want to call it, I wish with every fiber of my being they would stop wasting their efforts and raising my blood pressure.
If someone wants to stick a banner in their front lawn, I have no objection. Let that banner flutter and wave in the breeze. Free speech without all the chatter, that’s fine by me. But please do not attempt to position your banner in my yard, call me on the phone to sway my opinion, air repeated negative messages about the opponent, or assume that I am an unread or agnostic personality because I do not share your personal outlook. I don’t wish to know for whom you are going to vote. I don’t much care what you think of past or current Presidents (their birth certificates, or their dogs.) And I’m certainly not interested in anything you want to report about why I should mirror your convictions on any topic related to our government. I have my own passions and I’m fairly certain that my convictions and your convictions could not manage a civil and tolerant thumb-war, let alone a longwinded and exhaustive debate.
It is clear that most of us hold an untiring notion about what traits and beliefs are required in the making of an admirable and effective leader. I love my brothers and sisters in the faith, but I have to honestly say: religious people are the WORST. On the far right we’ve got “Christians” with their perception of God, guns, and tax shelters. On the far left we’ve got more “Christians” with their version of God, social justice, and wild spending. Both sides assume the other is laden with heathens. Both sides are convinced they have cornered the market on saving lives (be they born or unborn.) Neither political party is completely representative of my beliefs. So why is it that people constantly try to make politics a religious decision? More to the point, HOW can we be so brazen as to suggest WE know which way God would vote if subjected to our pitiful, hostile, and obscenely expensive elections? World hunger could be eradicated with the kind of dollars spent during one pathetic year of our mud-slinging coercive campaigns. It is sickening that furthering our political opinions seems so much more pressing than human decency.
So should you wish to send your electoral arguments, political cartoons, or emails fraught with scare-tactics (which appear solely designed to bash one side or the other), I beg you to refrain from trying to enlighten me. I don't ask you to agree with me. Your thoughts are your own. And I will be quietly reading what I can from whatever unbiased news source I can find; trying my best to form a personal decision with which I, myself, can live.
If in my zeal I get it all wrong and start spouting on some soapbox, I sincerely hope that my daughter is standing by to remind me how words are often superfluous and how truly ridiculous I can sometimes appear.
